Don’t ignore life’s common signposts

In life, we encounter signposts that remind us to stop, look, listen and learn. They are there for a reason and we are remiss if we don’t take them seriously.

Signs can be annoying when we just want to get on with the business of living, working and pursuing our goals. After all, we hear that the world is our oyster and the sky is the limit. We are busy trying to manage a multitude of tasks on our way to collect our pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. We barely have the time or patience to help those in need. We are so consumed by the demands of our busy lives that we discard common courtesies.

Furthermore, when we fall behind on our schedule or assume additional responsibilities, we step up the pace leaving collateral damage behind. Then, when we see signposts we lament, “I don’t have time for this.” But they are not obstructions in our path but designed to keep us safe, sane and centered.

Let’s look at some of life’s common signposts and their messages.

STOP

Because we are inclined to work ourselves ragged, insisting that our lifestyle and career demands that we be constantly on the go, this signpost reminds us to pull onto the shoulder and stop. Traveling at full speed, every day, with only the necessary daily stops to eat and sleep, is no way to live a fulfilled and joyful life. If we don’t stop for regularly scheduled physical, emotional and spiritual tune ups, eventually, we lose steam. With no energy left, our motivation falters, we lose hope, sputter and stall.

Sometimes “Stop” may mean a short rest just to take a breath and then we can move on. Other times, it demands a full-blown sabbatical to engage in serious self-evaluation and physical rejuvenation.

So, when you see the sign, please, STOP.

LOOK

Our lives today are cramped with 21st century demands, activities and concerns that did not exist before. We feel compelled to get with the program, fit in and go with the flow. Plus, modern-day life stands in glaring comparison to the “good old days.” And, we talk about them with more than a hint of nostalgia. Life was so simple and we could easily count the simple joys and blessings of that bygone era.

The weight of our responsibilities drives us to rise up and rush out before dawn and return long after dusk. The truly good things in life get lost in those long, activity-filled hours. Busy making a living, we forget to make a life.

But whether we see them or not, there are blessings today too. Don’t be content to just glance at them in the review mirror, as you hurry ahead. Look for them, acknowledge them, count them and more importantly, be thankful for them.

Look for the joys and blessings that grace your life and help you to walk through each day.

LISTEN

Sounds fill our days. Our hearts speak. Do we listen to its message? It sings. Do we hear its songs? When someone we know cries, do we listen to their sobs, try to decipher the deeper story behind their pain and take time to understand and empathize?

Additionally, we are more prone to discard the wiser voice of age and experience for the more popular modern thinking. Even the voice in own hearts gets lost in the din of other people’s opinions and preferences. Even worse, we turn a deaf ear to God’s voice in His word, reminding us of the age-old spiritual beliefs and precepts we have cast aside in favor of new-age principles.

Every so often, this signpost crops up to prompt us to turn away our ears from the wisdom of the world that may be contrary to the wisdom of God. It reminds us to listen once more to the commands to forgive, show compassion, give generously and selflessly, to practice self-control, and love our neighbor.

Are you listening to your heart, God’s voice and the cry of people around you?

LEARN

I believe that every circumstance in our lives bears a lesson for us to learn, memorize and carry with us as we move along. I also believe that we have a mandate to use the lessons we learn to encourage others in their own struggles.

It is all too common for us to grow discontent with the present state of affairs in our home life and work environment. Plus, reading about corruption, mounting crime statistics, delinquency and abuse everyday fills us with anxiety and fear. Left unchecked, these feelings will take us on the ride of our life, down the road of utter despair and hopelessness.

Whether from our own experiences or those of others, we can learn lessons that will impact how we deal with present and future situations. Hope, prayer, faith and dependence on God makes all the difference in how we handle and survive difficult times.

What lessons have you learned from the past? What lessons can you learn from the challenges you are facing today?

Life features many lanes and each is flooded with people on their individual journeys and some of us are in a mad rush to get to our destinations. In our harried pursuits, we take chances and shortcuts. We ignore the signposts with messages designed to enhance and improve our lives and the journeys we undertake.

Don’t ignore these signposts in your life – Stop, Look, Listen and Learn.

Are you spinning your wheels

At some point in our lives, most of us, decide that we want to make a change, either in our lifestyle, (health, spiritual climate, living conditions, leisure pursuits, etc.) or our career. The problem arises when we think only of making a change yet do nothing about it or engage in stop and go efforts. The result is the same; we end up spinning our wheels in our good intentions.

Very often, when we consider a change, it is in response to something negative. A troubled or failed relationship, organizational restructuring at work, illness and death are some of the reasons that might cause us to consider making a change. Moreover, we hope that the change we envision will purge us of the effects of our bad experiences and put some distance between us and our painful past.

Whatever triggered your decision, if you really want to effect some significant change in your life, you must have a clear idea of the change you want and the path you will follow to make it happen. Or, you could well find yourself stuck in a holding pattern and spinning your wheels.

These are the three strategies I continue to use to help me avoid this common dilemma in my own life.

Determine the outcome.

Do you know the old saying that asks, “If you don’t know where you are going, how will you know when you get there?”

This might seem obvious, but you will be surprised to learn how many people start the process of change without really having a clear idea of what they want to accomplish.

Wanting change in response to something negative is valid but we can be so focused on running away that we forget to look at what we say, we are running towards. The memory of difficult or painful experiences, coupled with the long-lasting consequences can consume our minds and muddle our ability to function in our day-to-day roles. Still, we must muster the courage to look away from the past and focus our attention and energies on the process that will make the dream of a particular change real.

Have you ever seen movies, where people are running from danger? They take off in a fright. They know only that they must get away, far away. Their frightened dash for safety usually takes them down a deserted part of town, a dark, lonely alley, usually with a dead end, or an abandoned house. Even the perceived threat of danger or some other distressing situation can thrust us into a disorganized flight. Like in the movies, we scamper with no clear idea of where we are going. We could end up running in circles, spinning our wheels and going nowhere.

It is only when you know definitively the change you want, will you be able to chart the course to take you there. And, you could travel the path with confidence instead of fear and doubt.

Design the structure:

Desire alone will not create the change you want, but structure will keep the change process together and moving at a manageable pace.

The structure you design should consist of the resources you will need to implement your change. Make sure you avail yourself of books and courses that can equip you for the way ahead.

Include the support mechanisms to help you work through the normal hiccups that accompany any change. Compile a list of people you can turn to when you feel stuck or despondent. Factor in leisure activities to add variety and respite from the demands of daily life and the stress of trying to implement changes. Activities unrelated to your day-to-day responsibilities can offer rest for your weary mind and body. Time alone is another necessary component of your support mechanism. Schedule it as you would any other activity. Make sure you have stretches of time to reflect and recharge your emotional batteries.

Draft a schedule of accountability:

Frequently, when we have no one to whom we have to give an account of our progress, we lapse. We let crucial tasks slip and fall by the wayside.

Even when the change is small, schedule periodic sessions with a mentor, fellow change-seeker, friend or family member. Your accountability team should be cognizant of your plan, the path as well as the problems you are facing. They should hold you accountable and not be afraid to demand it. They should be brutally honest and critical when necessary.

Update them on the progress you have made, the obstacles you faced and overcame and ask for advice to deal with any ongoing struggles.

Accounting sessions like these help to keep you motivated and focused. They help to cement the bond between you and those to whom you have to give an account.

Once we decide to effect some change in our lives, those critical voices in our heads begin to tell us that we are not good, smart, strong or worthy enough to accomplish our goals. They keep dredging up the issues that cast a coat of fear over us, causing us to doubt the validity of our decisions and we even toy with the idea of giving up.

Have you lost your initial desire for some change? Are you stuck there spinning your wheels?

I encourage you to revisit the outcome you wanted, revise the structure to get there and renew your accountability to someone. Your wheels will find their traction again and propel you on your way to the life change you want.